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Monday, August 23, 2010

Why DD

Someone asked this is another group. Here is my answer to why we practice dd. This is the short and sweet of it :) Im a list person by the way!

Because I recognize my weaknesses and I respect his strengths.
Because I am flighty and often disorganized.
Because I get butterflies in my stomach and weak in the knees knowing he is in charge.
Because it has opened communication.
Because it has reduced fights and tension.
Because it keeps me grounded.
Because having one person make the final decisions just makes sense.
Because there are no more power struggles
Because its satisfying
 Because I need it
Because the release helps me
Because I internalize everything
Because it was the best solution for us
Because I crave structure Because I crave discipline
Because it clarifies things for us and helps us break free from the chaotic world and concentrate on each other
Because I struggle with self esteem issues
Because I struggle with self control
Because I struggle with motivation
Because he is strong
Because he is organized
Because he can admit his weaknesses and mistakes
Because he is a natural leader and naturally dominant
Because for us it feels so natural and right
Because he knows me better than I often know myself
Because the intensity and communication in our relationship has grown so much

And... Because IT WORKS!


Elysia said...

A great list Jess!

Abel1234 said...

Enjoying your blog, having just discovered it.

I like this list - thought-provoking to read, from a top's perspective. Your list strikes me as a wonderfully comprehensive statement of why DD works; I guess there are maybe another couple of additional dimensions that come into play with me when thinking about DD - or, slightly more broadly in definition, punishing someone for r/l issues.

The first is because the woman is strong enough to articulate her desires for punishment, and to accept it - knowing that this is not 'abuse', but about consenting to something she wants and needs.

The second one would be about there being immense trust (even 'love' in some cases). That's so important.

(Not trying to amend your own personal list, you understand, which is wonderful. Just that it's so good that it's almost a blueprint for others thinking about their own DD relationships or desires).

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