! »

Sunday, March 20, 2011

I need a spanking.

I am seriously out of control. I hate this.

Sunday, March 13, 2011


In a month my husband will be home on R&R. As much cuddling and loving that will go on, I know that there will be some spanking too :( He's like Santa, he keeps a list, lol.

I am a bit worried about the spanking. I know he is a fair man and that he won't hurt me (well you know, outside of the spanking pain) but I worry because when he comes home it will be ten months since Ive had a spanking.

I actually swatted myself with a wooden spoon once yesterday, just to see how it feels. It hurts! I sure hope I get a lot of good girl spankings before a bad girl one *WEG* to help my bum a little bit.

Hubby wants me to throw away my sleeping pills. I seem to have some weird reactions to the ambien. I dont remember anything that occurs after I take it, I get up and do weird things, I have weird conversations with people... sort of like being drunk but even worse! But right now with the stress and anxiety of him being gone I cant sleep naturally (and I have tried EVERYTHING). At least with the ambien I sleep. Yet, I got up, made a sandwich, left it all on the counter and went back to bed. One night I took a bath at two am and recorded it and sent it to my best friend. Another time I unloaded the dishwasher and fell asleep clutching a pan in the middle of the kitchen. Ive fallen down the stairs. Ive left weird voice messages. It really messes me up. I dont understand because I have no recollection of doing these things.

He told me to flush them.

But if I dont I wont sleep.

I always obey. Why cant I on this?